Who taught Faraaz to stay fearless while facing horror?

Who taught Faraaz to stay fearless while facing horror?

By KORAL DASGUPTA | | 9 July, 2016
Faraaz Hossain.
The latest terrorist attack in Bangladesh earlier this month left many of us heartbroken. The horrific affair posed some serious questions in the context of parenting. Questions that have no easy answers.

Faraaz Hossain is all over the internet, gathering accolades, getting blessed and the unfortunate loss being mourned worldwide. The More you read about him, the more does a part of your soul feel paralysed. And the more it prompts me to wonder, who are the parents or teachers of this braveheart, who taught him to stay fearless when he must choose the fair path over an easy path? A fundamental question that rips apart the heart is, given a choice today, would the parents wish that they planned his learnings differently? Would they wish that the child fled with his life and stayed alive, rather than embrace a brave death?

The question that haunts is, what should be our vision regarding our children? A large life or a long life?

No parent would ever want to experience the worst curse of their lives. We all want to see our children cheerful and happy, growing and prospering with each passing day. We want them to learn right virtues and become good human beings. But how good? Good at the cost of their lives? That might bring parents paranormal pride, but can that pride ever make up for the brutal loss?

Faraaz Hossain reminds one of Keenan Santos, Reuben Fernandes, Ramesh Jadhav and many others who were murdered because they fearlessly stood in favour of what they felt was correct! Such examples are rampant across the world.

So what do we as parents choose for our children? Should we teach them to be generous only after selfish interests are taken care of? Or should we encourage them to make a fair choice, irrespective of everything else?

For this, I have no answer. No parent will ever have an answer. They can’t.

And for once, this article I am offering is not meant to reach a logical conclusion. This is just about putting across the table, some random thoughts as I salute the parents of these brave souls.

So what do we as parents choose for our children? Should we teach them to be generous only after selfish interests are taken care of? Or should we encourage them to make a fair choice, irrespective of everything else?

On the other hand, simultaneously, my brain is obsessively occupied thinking about the trauma of parents of those boys who picked up weapons on that fateful evening in Bangladesh. All of them were (reportedly) born and brought up in middle-class families and were offered good education. Like anyone else, these boys must also have grown up learning the right virtues. They must have been treated with tenderness and strictness, like all other parents do. They must have loved their parents and relatives and friends as does any other person.

What doctrine could then change their priorities? What replaced their capacity to love, to the extent that they could commit such criminal cruelty? How could they forget their parents and the lessons taught to them during their upbringing? How could they disown their house which practiced humanity for a ruthless, devilish cause? 

This again doesn’t have an answer.

Come to think of it, both the victim and the accused didn’t fear for their lives. Obviously the attackers knew that they will either be killed or caught. Both followed the path that they felt was appropriate for them. Both serviced the “cause” that they wanted to stand for, unconditionally. That perhaps was the most basic learning they had received from their parents, like we all did, like we all pass to our children. To gallantly follow our heart and walk the path of our own truth!

The only difference is, that “truth” is different for the victims and the accused.

Till the last moment, Faraaz Hossain may have hoped that if he didn’t leave the side of his friends then all of them could be saved.

Till the last moment, the attackers must have felt that they have successfully accomplished what they had come to achieve.

My heart goes out to the parents of both the attacker and the attacked. The former will lead a life of shame, hatred, betrayal, as they wouldn’t be able to figure out how their upbringing and dreams with their kids could be defeated all so mercilessly. The latter because, in the heart of their hearts, they’d never forgive themselves for not being with their children when they needed ultimate protection. After all, that is one vow every parent takes when a child is born.

May God heal them.

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